Thursday, August 04, 2005

The kid who does not kid !

As I promised, I'm back here to narrate the entire incident of how me and my cousin got kicked out of a club in Kualalampur.I warn you now that this incident or story isn't exactly as exciting as it may sound.During my ten day stay in KL with my cousins (the elder one being my age ie 19) my brother, my cousin ( the nineteen year old one, the other one is just twelve .. I THINK ) and I had long decided that once my parents left back for India (they left for India two days before us) the three of us would explore the night life pre-existent in the enlightening city of KL. Enlightening because this is the city where I seem to have got my first 'drunk' lesson. So, everything was set, my parents left for India and the very next night we set off from home at around 7:30pm after bidding our goodbye's to my aunt and uncle, and also after repetitive advice from dear uncle of mine not to get into trouble tonight.
At last we were out, three juvenile guys bounded only by blood and affection (yea RIGHT !!) with an entire night to themselves to explore the city of lights : KUALA LUMPUR (I think I'll exclude my brother out of the "juvenile" category. Reason : at twenty three he speaks like my dad.. Sorry brother but you do ). Sounds pretty dynamic when I say but, from the limited knowledge of the city that dear cousin of mine had I was to find that he was inequipped even to get us something edible to eat before we crashed into a club. At long last we came to a street shop which was APPARENTLY famous for good food (sorry, I seem to have forgotten what my cousin said it was famous for). We asked him for some noodles of some sort which had sea food in majority and the majority of us (ie all three of us) weren't exactly fond of sea food, so my cousin ordered the same without the sea food (sea food , read prawn). This turned out to be quite something else as the sea food was the main ingredient of that particular dish. We ended up eating something that very distinctly tasted like : egg noodles, which I don't think was very far from what we ate, all the time cursing my cousin to have brought us to this place of all to eat egg noodles of everything one could get. But, then again, there was a bright side to it (or is it?) . That being we got to taste what the malysians called "lemoise" or in common tongue : lemon juice with ice, but I was in the mood for quite a little something else to drink viz : ALCOHOL !
At long last at around eight thirty pm we reached this club called ... called .. My memory fails me again, I think it was chemical joint or something along those lines. Anyways, we got to this club and found it pretty empty (we were the only ones there besides the people who worked there) to which my cousin claimed the reason to be : "We've come here too early." We just gave a "O what the hell ! " and got started on our primary work there : to get drunk with carlsberg ! (hmmm.. carlsberg really oughta be paying me money for so much advertisement, but i guess all this is negative publicity for them ) So, there we were in "Chemical (something) " starting on carlsberg's as the place slowly filled up. As I drank more, I seemed to remember less of whatever happened. I just remember doing a lot of talking with my brother and cousin about life and the apparent "hot chicks" of Malaysia (which to date I still believe to be non-existent.. hmmm.. There was a skimpy dressed tall woman behind the counter..). Then the club got utterly crowded, my cousin seemed to meet a lot of his local friends there too. At this point of time we seemed to have exhausted our drinks (and our money), so my brother decided he was gonna head home while the night was still young, we tried pleading him to stay but all in vain. So he left, and so did we, not for home but just to explore other clubs in the neighbourhood. I was just about getting high, and seemed to be going quite quiet (I'm opposite of most people who start crapping when they're drunk, as that's what I'll be doing when I'm saner.. If one can call it that). While moving around in the local "club's" suburb, we bumped into someone unexpected and burst out laughing : my brother ! He'd not managed to get a taxi back home. We made sure he did finally catch a taxi and bumped him off home and as for us, after noticing "bouncers" guarding all the other clubs in the suburb we decided to get back to the place we started and we found the place even more crowded than when we'd left it.
Inspired by the crowd, the two of us went in to have a shot of tequila each (I'd held out on money, to save for a rainy day. As I hadn't exactly seen one like that coming in the near future, I decided to hold out the money no longer.). Oh WOW!! Tequila (hope I spelt it right) really gets to your head in no time. The two of us were on an ULTRA high now. Just as we started dancing to the music going on, a tall bulky bald chap started to converse with my cousin. Here follows, the apparent, conversation between the two :-
Baldy : Hi !
Cousin: Hello !
Baldy : Where're you from?
Cousin : From India, I live here in KL. Been here for the past 3-4yrs.
Baldy : How old are you?
Cousin : Twenty one! You can see my visa if you like (handing out a copy of his Malaysian visa)
Baldy : (Examining the visa) What about your friend there? (referring to me, I was pretty benign to whatever was happening here under the assumption that this was another one of my cousin's friends)
Cousin: He's my cousin visiting me here from India(here he nudged me to pay attention, I gave the two of them a dazed look)
Baldy : How old is he?
Cousin : Twenty one !
Baldy : Should've said fifteen I would have believed you.
Cousin : He's twenty going on twenty one.
Baldy :This club is only for twenty one and above. I request you to get the hell outta here.
Cousin (pulling me along) : ok, okay!
So far, I had no idea as to who the bald chap was, only after coming out did my cousin inform me that the baldy was actually a plain-clothes-policeman and then he told me about the conversation he had jus had with him. All in all, we did get kicked outta the club and my cousin spent the rest of the night feeding me - lemoise with .. (again my memory fails me to remember that dish we had there). Then with nothing else to do and all the other clubs being guarded by bouncers, we caught a taxi home, during this journey I was apparently educating my dear cousin about the t-nine dictionary(the uneducated, read predictive text in one's mobile phone).
I guess I was wrong after all, I don't exactly keep quiet when drunk. :-).